The Sexuality Temptation, Balancing Hormones and the Skull

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader composed in with a dating dilemma and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and men use love to obtain sex." This is a great summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where singles analyze excellent sex as love. However those who fall under the Sex Trap go even further since for these singles, having sex carries immense significance and repercussions.

Songs fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two ways:

A.they think sex is a required test of compatibility, (if the sex is good then the relationship will ready as well).

B.more frequently, all consciousness heads out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed singles consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they make love.
Rather than looking at whether this other person might be a match on levels other than physical attraction-- such as long-lasting requirements, needs, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to correspond with reality when all those hormonal agents are running wild. Our body reacts to somebody we are attracted to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone (increases libido), which makes the opportunity to have sex with somebody we are brought in to incredibly difficult to resist. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts upon the hypothalamus to produce emotions), that makes us feel very near to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are strong and Read Full Article uncontrolled , leading to powerful sensations of attraction, excitement, well-being, love, and nearness .

When problems emerge, those who fall into the Sex Trap often rationalize by thinking, "Well, we've got problems, but the sex is great!" They more than likely wouldn't admit it, however they focus on physical intimacy and concern the rest as optional. Their primary searching tools are sexual destination and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mostly with gay males, says that much of his clients have fallen under the Sex Trap.

" For gay men particularly in cities, sex is readily available, which in itself is a trap," North says. "In addition, the culture, with its emphasis on physical appearance, motivates sex. If a possible partner is going to be sexually compatible, many gay guys want to find out from the beginning. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to ready?".

However, North adds, "I think this is a ' person' thing instead of a 'gay' thing.".
I do desire to explain that chemistry is necessary. Chemistry is a given that we cannot manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the collaboration to work. look here If not there, look here we can't "make" chemistry occur, though sometimes it can grow with time.

Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication subsides and reality hits.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you need to balance your heart (and hormones) with your head. This implies combining chemistry with common sense. While good sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner choices by paying complete attention to your vision, objectives, requirements, and values -- while feeling all those amazing sparks!

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