The Sensuality Deception, Balancing Hormonal Agents and the Mind

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader composed in with a dating problem and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to get love, and men use love to get sex." This is a fantastic summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where singles interpret good sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further since for these singles, having sex carries tremendous significance and repercussions.

Singles fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they think sex is a needed test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will be good also).

B.more frequently, all awareness heads out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed songs consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they make love.
Rather than looking at whether this other person may be a match on levels other than physical destination-- such as long-lasting requirements, needs, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to communicate with truth when all those hormones are running wild. Our body responds to somebody we are attracted to by producing hormonal agents such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), makings the chance to make love with somebody we are brought in to extremely tough to withstand. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts upon the hypothalamus to produce feelings), that makes us feel extremely near to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical responses are strong and involuntary , leading to effective sensations of tourist attraction, enjoyment, well-being, closeness, and love .

When issues develop, those who fall into the Sex Trap frequently rationalize by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, however the sex is terrific!" They probably wouldn't confess, but they focus on physical intimacy and concern the rest as optional. Their primary searching tools are sexual attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay males, says that a number of his clients have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men specifically in cosmopolitan areas, sex is easily available, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be good?".

Nevertheless, North click now includes, "I suspect this is a ' man' thing instead of a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to mention that chemistry is essential. Yet, chemistry is a considered that we can't manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry happen, though in some cases it can grow with time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication wears off and truth hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you should balance your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This implies combining chemistry with common sense. While great sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you need to make your partner choices by paying complete focus on your vision, requirements, values, and goals -- while feeling all those interesting triggers!

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